Stronghold Starter #6 Lust: I Deserve to Get My Needs Met, No Matter The Cost

I know, I know.  We all think of sex when it come to lust.  But, if you check the word in Greek, you will get:  “to set one’s heart upon.”  You desire it.  You long for it.  You can also long for something forbidden.  (Strong’s)

We are all familiar with the words of Jesus: “But I tell you that anyone who looks at a woman lustfully has already committed adultery with her in his heart.” (Matt. 5:28)  Obviously, Jesus rightly discerned how what we think in our minds can quickly come to fruition and become action. 

But He also looked deeper into the human heart and saw how our longings can become our consumings, to coin a word.

Of course, we can be tempted to long for sex.  We think that another relationship, another encounter, another kind of experience will fill that deep void in us once and for all.  There’s the rub: lust is the one appetite that is never satiated.  We moderns call it “sex addiction.”  Addiction, by definition, is an never-ending pursuit of that high.  Why?  That high, for now, makes us forget our lives.

But, let’s look at the deeper picture.  "Lust” in Greek can be translated in different ways, although it’s the same word:

“For truly I tell you, many prophets and righteous people longed to see what you see but did not see it, and to hear what you hear but did not hear it.”  (Matt. 13:17)

“And he said to them, “I have eagerly desired to eat this Passover with you before I suffer.” (Luke 22:15)

Do you see it? This word carries a meaning of a heart deeply immersed in longing, desiring, wanting; clearly, this can be seen in a positive way.  Jesus told His disciples that the prophets of old wanted desperately to see what they then saw: the Messiah, the Deliverer of God’s people, the very Son of David, whose kingdom is forever.

Jesus used the word of Himself; He knew His days were numbered.  He wanted to share a meal that represented deliverance and His impending death would do just that for His disciples and the world. 

But the darker side of longing, blended with our pride that puts us at the center, creates a longing that moves us as far way from God as we can get: 

“For the flesh desires what is contrary to the Spirit, and the Spirit what is contrary to the flesh. They are in conflict with each other, so that you are not to do whatever you want.” (Gal. 5:17)

So, with our flesh in the lead, the longing for God gets derailed into a longing for anything but Him; we are trapped by our longings, because they will never satisfy us.  Ever.  Why?  We were made for God, pure and simple.  No one or nothing else will fill the God-shaped void in our heart.  

So, how to maneuver this choice between longing for the dark and longing for the light? 

Do not set foot on the path of the wicked
    or walk in the way of evildoers.
Avoid it, do not travel on it;
    turn from it and go on your way.
For they cannot rest until they do evil;
    they are robbed of sleep till they make someone stumble.       

                                                                                  (Prov. 4:14-16)

Don’t get into the arena of sin in the first place.  If I don’t want to go three rounds with Mike Tyson and get pummeled to a pulp, I don’t climb into the ring in the first place.  If he pounds me on the street, that’s assault and battery.  But if he pounds me in the ring, that’s a sporting event carried on national television and the winner gets a prize and prestige. 

My task?  Again, look at the advice Proverbs gives:

Above all else, guard your heart,
    for everything you do flows from it.
Keep your mouth free of perversity;
    keep corrupt talk far from your lips.
Let your eyes look straight ahead;
    fix your gaze directly before you.
Give careful thought to the paths for your feet
    and be steadfast in all your ways.
Do not turn to the right or the left;
    keep your foot from evil.      

                                                                                      (Prov. 4: 23-27)

Ultimately, because of pride, we will rationalize our sin as meeting a need (regardless of the cost) because we deserve it:

Hey, it’s online!  It’s not like I am having an affair or anything!

When I  verb of choice,  I feel better.  Don’t deny me that.  I have earned it. 

I have been good for  fill in the amount of time,  so I deserve a break to indulge a little.  I promise it’s only a little.

Who are you to judge?  You don’t know the struggles I face.

God may help you, but He’s checked out on me.  Guess I will try to overcome this myself.

I can still hang out with my ex- fill in the addiction  friends.   Yeah, they tempt me, but I gotta stand strong.  If I fail, God is there to forgive me. 

At the core of these statements is, I will get my needs met—now.  The consequences?  I am not worried about that now, just get me to Distraction Junction as soon as possible, so I can board that train and forget my life for a while. 

Lust in us is longing, yet the road we are on distracts us from our true calling--residing in Christ--and drives us deeper and deeper into sin.  

Trust in Him, however, is true fulfillment.

God will fill every corner of our hearts, if we allow it.

This is key.  Jesus will not trespass.  He must be invited in.  If you leave a door locked, with your  guilty pleasure tucked inside, He won’t break the door down.  But Satan will, and will add more and more pleasure and guilt for you to hide in that locked room.  He loves the dark corners of your heart, and blackmail you with shame and guilt.

Guilt says, (with Satan’s voiceover) What you did was bad. You can't help yourself.  Others do the same thing and get away with it.  Just forget about it.  

Shame says, (with Satan’s booming voiceover) You are bad. You were born that way.  You are who you are.  Take pride in it, 'cause that's all you've got.  Make the best of it.  

But what does God say to those who accept His Son, with guilt and shame washing over their hearts in drowning waves of emptiness and hopelessness: 

“But you are a chosen people, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, God’s special possession, that you may declare the praises of him who called you out of darkness into his wonderful light.” (1 Peter 2:9)

You are chosen in Christ, arrayed in His robe of righteousness and a bride, inestimably loved.

You are a priest, allowed to walk into the very throne room of God, arrayed in Christ and speaking to the Father without fear.

You are part of a holy nation, made up of those who walk in Christ, not in their own power, but in His.

You are special, held in His hands, never to be let go. Ever.

You are His messenger. You tell of the Light as you walk in the light and you announce to the Darkness that you are free in Him. Whoever is free in Him is free indeed.

Sword Time! Scriptures to Tear Down #5!

If we are to counter the whisperings that God doesn't care, or that fear is our permanent status, then we must unsheath our sword.  In other words, let's open the Word when fear, insecurity and questioning God's trustworthiness hits our hearts.  Remember: The S/Word is our weapon of warfare as we engage in battle.

I should have brought forth the word in the earlier blog, but it is so easy to become wrapped up in our won stories, and lose sight of the Rock upon which we stand. 

Here we go:

S/Word Swing: "When I am afraid, I put my trust in you." (Ps. 56:3) ("be bold confident, secure, sure"--Strong's)

S/Word Swing: "There is no fear in love. But perfect love drives out fear, because fear has to do with punishment. The one who fears is not made perfect in love." (1 John 4:18) ("brought to its end, finished"--Strong's)

S/Word Swing: "God is our refuge and strength, an ever-present help in trouble." (Ps. 46:1) ("assistance"--Strong's)

S/Word Swing: "For the Spirit God gave us does not make us timid, but gives us power, love and self-discipline." (2 Timothy 1:6-7) ("an admonishing or calling to soundness of mind, to moderation and self-control"--Strong's)

S/Word Swing: "No temptation has overtaken you except what is common to mankind. And God is faithful; he will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, [tested, testing] he will also provide a way out so that you can endure it." (1 Cor. 10:13) ("an egress, way out, exit"--Strong's) 

So, I must  engage in a wee bit of commentary.  If we trust, we have confidence in what we do, correct?  If I trust my car is in working order, I climb in, turn the ignition and away I go.  If I have a lemon, then I am never sure of its reliability.  

God is reliable because He is utterly trustworthy, for He has shown His mercy and grace time and time again.  Read His Word and follow His grace-filled story of warning, punishment and then  restoration.  Satan harps on the punishment part, because it makes God look capricious.  But Satan ignores (and so do we) the "bookends" of God's mercy:  He warns His people, follows through if  they ignore Him and then later will restore them with lovingkindness.  

Final word:  Many people quote an axiom that goes something like this: "God will not give you more than you can handle."  So, if your daughter is sick and then dies, you can bear this, because God gave this to you, knowing you can handle it.  

WHAT?

We usually quote this as if to comfort the person with some kind of biblical-sounding wisdom.  GO TO THE WORD, PLEASE.   Look carefully at 1 Corinthians 10:13, which I believe is the mother to this illegitimate child of a saying.  

God doesn't hand you two tons of burden, asking you to carry it, because He knows you can handle it.  He then leaves the situation, takes a seat in the cosmic bleachers and watches you, to see how you are doing. HUH?

The Word says that tempting (Satan capitalizing on our own desires--James 1:13-15) or testing (our character and how much we trust God--James 1:2-4)) will come.  Jesus faced Satan all the time, whether in the desert, through the scornful attacks by the Pharisees or the betrayal by a friend, and He wasn't told, "Handle it, Son."  

God is "ever-present" in our trials and temptations.  God does not leave us in our greatest moment of pain and suffering.  We are not laboratory mice where God sees how much humanity can take.

We are His sons and daughters.  If you look at the final words of the verse, He will provide a "way out" or "exit" in the Greek.  

Think of it this way.  You are in a burning building.  Maybe you fell asleep with a cigarette in your hand, or forgot to turn off the stove.  Maybe your old toaster sparked and caught fire.  Maybe some neighborhood malcontent threw a lighted match into a pile of leaves and your house caught fire.  Does it matter?  Yes, maybe later for reflection and seeking what God would have you learn and grow in the knowledge of...but for now, you want out.

The firefighter shows up.  He knows the way in and the safest way out--that is part of his training.  He comes over and takes your hand, leading you out the front door, where the flames haven't yet engulfed.  

Now, according to the axiom, you yell, "Hey!  I can handle this!" (Not!)

According to His Word, God, says, "Come this way, child.  Follow Me out."

The net result of the axiom is you feeling sorry for yourself ("Thanks a bunch, God. I ain't handling this!") and having others feel sorry for you ("She is a victim of such terrible circumstances!")

Stuck in the muck. 

The net result of His Word is you have pain and suffering yes, just as Jesus did, and He will show you "the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus." (Phil. 4:7)

Locked on the Rock. 

You will grow in your trust of Him. You will be a light to His faithfulness in the battle.

I know which one I'd choose.

Stronghold Starter #5: Insecurity, Fear, Lack of Trust: God is Not Reliable. I Take Care of Me.

Whew.  This one is HUGE.

I trust God...How dare you say I don't?

I am a Christian.  Of course, I trust God.

I have faith.  I decree it.  I claim it in Jesus' name.  God does it.  What more do you want?

Yes, I have fear.  But I love God.  Trust?  Wow.  I just don't know...

OK.  This can be a sensitive subject, because it sounds like a formula:

I accepted Jesus in faith + I am a new creation = God wants the best for me 

Let's look at the disciples. They walked every day for three years as followers of Jesus. They saw Him eat, sleep, walk on water, feed thousands, raise the dead, heal, confront, turn over tables in the Temple and a whole lot more. John comments that "Jesus performed many other signs in the presence of his disciples, which are not recorded in this book. But these are written that you may believe that Jesus is the Messiah, the Son of God, and that by believing you may have life in his name." (John 20:30-1)

Yet they still, in spite of all this, needed forgiveness. Grace. More faith. More trust. So, this is not an accusation, but an acknowledgement of our proclivity to rely on ourselves when the going gets tough.  

We all know the story of the man who believed in Jesus, yet wanted more belief: 

"Jesus said to him, 'If you can believe, all things are possible to him who believes.'

Immediately the father of the child cried out and said with tears, 'Lord, I believe; help my unbelief!'"(Mark 9:23-4)

The father had some faith, or he would not have approached Jesus.  But he realized very quickly that his faith was not up to the enormous task--perhaps for the first time in a long time he could not rely on himself to figure it out.  He was afraid.  He may have thought that God was unreliable, for if sickness or demon possession is punishment from God, how could his son from birth be guilty?  The son's torment did not fit into a neat category, and cast doubt about the goodness of God.  

This is at the heart of this Stronghold Starter: Pride whispers in our ear that we are foolish to rely on God because how could He allow something so horrible to happen in the first place?  We are afraid that our whole belief system and our faith are lies.  We feel insecure, because if God is not reliable, then who can you trust?  

We turn to ourselves.  We try to control the situation with our _______________.  We get limited results, but they are results, darn it!  We didn't have to wait and wait and wait!  We did something now.  

Now, what if that blank is filled in with the word, "faith"?  Uh-oh.  Now we are stepping on the toes of those who believe this way:  My faith is a gateway to God's blessing.  More faith, more blessings.  My faith unlocks the treasure chest of all that God wants me to have--money, health, prosperity, my best life--and with my faith operational, the chest flies open and I am flooded with His goodness towards me. 

But what about the one who says, Am I?  But my child is still sick.  I did not get the promotion.  I didn't get that car I wanted, for the loan was turned down.  The results from my examination came back positive and so I must return to my doctor for more treatments.  

Solution?  More faith, of course.  I haven't released enough.  I have negatively confessed my worries, concerns, fears, and insecurity, and so no wonder:  my faith is stifled by my words.  I must get more faith.  God wants all the good that heaven holds for me, so if it's not raining down and making my desert bloom, it's me.  Help me in my unbelief...no, wait!  Help me to speak only faith-filled words.  

Where is God in all of this?  I, I, I...starts every sentence.  

God is my Servant, released to do His best for me by my faith.  

But is God reliable?  Will He released those things He has for me even if my faith is weak?  Did Jesus withhold healing of the demon-possessed boy because the father's faith was weak?  No.  Jesus healed the boy because God is good.  

So, why is the Prosperity Gospel so popular in the US?  In the Third World?  It packaged skillfully but at its root is the same idea:  Get Faith, Get the Goodies of God.  Lack Faith, Lack Getting the Goodies of God.

Harsh?  No, because I have spent time with this gospel and those who follow it.  I find it disturbing, because it appeals to the "I" that we all have. But more to the point, it appeals to a fundamental belief that God is not good in and of Himself, but needs us to release His goodness by our faith.  

We won't call Him "unreliable" until our son dies, our job is taken away, or our health breaks down.  We might not say it at first, but after many years of mustering faith and our lives still have struggles, failures and pain, we grow weary.  

The formula doesn't work and God's character is called into question.

BOOM!  That is exactly what Satan wants.  He is always trying to assassinate God's character.  What better way than to twist the Gospel and the idea of faith, have a large number of people join up watching wealthy preachers who seem to have unlocked God's blessings, and then one day, no matter how great the faith, the answer doesn't come.  

We don't see those folks at altar.  We don't see those folks at the church.  They are gone, because God's "failure" (really, it's the faulty teaching) has shown Him to be "unreliable."

They have come to a place where they trust only themselves.  Satan is smiling.  

Finally, how do people get attracted to such a gospel?  Unspoken but compelling reasons exist deep in the hearts of people I have seen with these beliefs:

God didn't protect me when I was abused, so He owes me.  My daddy/brutish male figure ain't controlling me, I am controlling Daddy.  

Had an absentee dad, so now my heavenly Father will fulfill my longing for material goods.  

I have power now.  I have felt so powerless over the years, but in this church, I am excited again!  I can decree it and God will answer me!

My life is a sad accumulation of poor choices, but when I speak in faith, I am no longer affected by those choices.  For awhile, at least.  

I am more spiritually attuned than those other churches that teach of Christ's suffering and having to wait on God.  No way.  God wants it for me now, so my faith releases it now!

My heart hurts for those who stand broken on this road, with Satan whispering in their hearts about how more faith is needed, how God is holding out, how He is unreliable.

Jesus, Who never had a beautiful home, lots of money, prestige, fame and followers is for the rest of us, who cry out, "Lord, help me in my unbelief."

Stronghold Starter #4: Greed/Envy: I Deserve More. Others? Less.

In the pursuit of wealth and the good life: 

When it's me, I am being ambitious; providing for my family; investing in the future; enjoying life; grabbing some gusto; trying to make sure my kids lack nothing.  

When it's you, you are being greedy.  

Do you notice the duplicity?  I have rationalized my greediness into something respectable.  My motives are noble and yours are not.  

But greed by any other name would still stink.  Why?  Greed is love misplaced.  Greed says:

I deserve it. (God is taking too long or just doesn't understand the needs I have.)

I deserve more. (God will meet my needs, yes, but my wants?  I have to provide.)

I need more.  (God just doesn't understand the emptiness I feel; money and stuff help fill the void.)

I can give more to the Kingdom. (But I skim off my portion first; God gets the leftovers.)

My love for God is being poisoned, for deep inside I really don't trust Him.  My love gets poured into what I can do and what I can control.  Look what Jesus says in Matthew 6:24: “No one can serve two masters. Either you will hate the one and love the other, or you will be devoted to the one and despise the other. You cannot serve both God and money."

Service comes from loyalty, love and trust.  I can serve me or I can trust God's love for me, and serve Him. 

OK.  We expect the world to be greedy.  They don't have the Lord.  But I have seen greed in church.  I have seen it in me in church.  I have seen my greed become envy and it is disgusting:  

Hey!  I am a talented singer.  Why is she on the worship team and not me?

Hey!  I wanted to be the women's ministry leader: I am the most mature.  Why wasn't I picked? 

Hey!  I have the most knowledge of the Bible than any of those folks.  I should be upfront teaching.  

Hey!  The men in our church are so passive.  Why can't women be pastors?  Why does the Word limit us? 

So, greed and its mini-me, envy, become a mindset.  "I, I, I..." is the key of the song of pride I sing.  I assume God has a limited number of pie slices of service, so if you get one slice, you've taken one from me.  So, I have to push, scheme and pray that I get it.  If I don't get it, I have the right to resent you.  

Even if the Lord has closed the door to me, I still look over my shoulder at you.  But I am like Lot's wife--I am encased in the salt of pride and greed.  I deserve this!  You?  Not so much.

Look at the advice that Paul gives to a young pastor in 1 Timothy 6:10:  "For the love of money is a root of all kinds of evil. Some people, eager for money, have wandered from the faith and pierced themselves with many griefs."

Hear that church?  How many pastors have built a foundation of "You give to me to get from God but I keep the money for myself" for a ministry?  How many people see a big church, a big building, big programs and a big budget and say, "Wow!  That church is blessed?"  Is it?  

Then Jesus was a failure according to the modern definition of church success: "Then a teacher of the law came to him and said, “Teacher, I will follow you wherever you go.” Jesus replied, “Foxes have dens and birds have nests, but the Son of Man has no place to lay his head.” (Matt. 8:20)

If we follow Him, we follow Him!  Look how Jesus lived:  He trusted in God's provision every day of His life. 

We don't rationalize our greedy grabbing because somehow God is limited in His resources. We look at money as a blessing to pass on to others, and not see it as an end in itself. Yes, God is delighted when we are delighted, but He is aggrieved when we focus on the gift, and not the Gift-Giver.

Greed is a stronghold starter because it keeps the focus on us and not on God.  It causes us to trust ourselves; to look at God with reservations and not with total love and gratitude; and it causes strife in the church:  "For where you have envy and selfish ambition, there you find disorder and every evil practice." (James 3:16)  

How many churches and ministries are ineffectual because behind the scenes, disorder and evil practices reign?  

There is no "I" in Jesus.  There is "us."  You and me.  Jesus and us.  We are His body.  He loves us and nothing on this earth can ever replace that: "Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication, with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God; and the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus." (Phil. 4:6-7)

Paul learned this:  "But I rejoiced in the Lord greatly that now at last your care for me has flourished again; though you surely did care, but you lacked opportunity. Not that I speak in regard to need, for I have learned in whatever state I am, to be content: I know how to be abased, and I know how to abound. Everywhere and in all things I have learned both to be full and to be hungry, both to abound and to suffer need. I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me." (Phil. 4:10-13)

Here is where we stand when Satan casts aspersions on God's goodness and provision: "And my God shall supply all your need according to His riches in glory by Christ Jesus." (Phil. 4:19)

Amen. 

  

A Slight But Necessary Detour: Daniel 10

The Bible is very clear about the unseen world.   These days, we scratch our heads and wonder, "What is going on?"  Insanity, illogical thinking, rage, violence and just plain unkindness is the order of the day.  Left or right, liberal or conservative, young or old:  we all sense a level of insanity that is disturbing.  People look for all kinds of reasons.  It's gotta be the:

President 

Republicans 

Deep State

Democrats

Congress

Christians 

Whites

Supreme Court

News media

Young

Old...

The list goes on and on.  We humans are extremely talented at pointing the finger at everyone but ourselves; this started all the way back in the Garden of Eden.  After eating the forbidden fruit, Adam blamed God for giving him Eve and then blamed Eve; Eve blamed the serpent and the serpent was eerily quiet.  

The moment sin entered the planet, we have not taken responsibility for our sin and the consequences of it.  

Now, you may think I am letting people off the hook by focusing on the unseen world.  No. Far from it.  This blog series ("Stronghold Starters") is dedicated to how we allow ourselves to be used by the unseen world with our attitudes.  We host the attitudes; evil then hosts us.  But we open the door.   

The unseen world is active and influential, according to Ephesians 6:12: "For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms."  

So, the magnitude of the struggle is much larger than just "those people."  

Paul squarely looks at us and then the unseen world:  "As for you, you were dead in your transgressions and sins, in which you used to live when you followed the ways of this world and of the ruler of the kingdom of the air, the spirit who is now at work in those who are disobedient. All of us also lived among them at one time, gratifying the cravings of our flesh and following its desires and thoughts. Like the rest, we were by nature deserving of wrath. But because of his great love for us, God, who is rich in mercy, made us alive with Christ even when we were dead in transgressions—it is by grace you have been saved." (Eph. 2:1-5)

Boom.  There it is.  We have a role (following and gratifying our sin nature) and we are also used to achieve a larger agenda for the unseen world.  What is that agenda?  It is our destruction.  Satan doesn't care how you get there...drugs, alcohol, war, suicide, mass murder...whatever puts you six feet under, dirt dead.  

You live without hope--no faith in Jesus, just despair and anger over how things are and a feeling of powerlessness to change it.  

You die without hope--no faith in Jesus, just an eternity without God.  God doesn't send us to Hell--we choose to live without Him here and thus we choose to live without Him in eternity. 

But, every now and then, the Bible draws back the curtain on the unseen world. Daniel, chapter 10, is such a place. Quick summary: Daniel has a vision of war to come and its great hardships. He has been fasting and mourning for three weeks. He then sees a beautifully dressed man on the other side of the river where he is standing, and he is overwhelmed by what he is seeing. 

A gently hand touches him and says, “Do not be afraid, Daniel. Since the first day that you set your mind to gain understanding and to humble yourself before your God, your words were heard, and I have come in response to them. But the prince of the Persian kingdom resisted me twenty-one days. Then Michael, one of the chief princes, came to help me, because I was detained there with the king of Persia. Now I have come to explain to you what will happen to your people in the future, for the vision concerns a time yet to come.” (Daniel 10:12-14)

What a minute.  Who is this "prince"?  Isn't he a human ruler over the people?  No, because Michael, an angel, (chief prince) comes to his aid.  The "prince" is Heaven's enemy in the unseen realms and Michael is a prince sent to contend with the one who rules over Persia. 

Do you see my point?  Behind the human agent, is an unseen agent who uses, manipulates and then destroys the human agent.  The evil work gets done.  Does that mean that every evil act is from the unseen realm, and we are merely puppets?  No.

We are more than capable of doing harm to ourselves and to one another.  But:  There have been times in history where evil has been unleashed in a way that astonishes even us. 

In the 20th century, more than 100 million people died in genocides.   People were shocked at the depravity and numbers of dead in:

The Armenian genocide

The rape of Nanking, China

The Holocaust

China under Mao

The USSR under Stalin

Cambodia under Pol Pot

Rwanda

The Congo

Syria

Recently, we are appalled at young people going into schools with guns and mowing down their fellow students and teachers.  People throwing bombs into nightclubs.  A man mowing down concert-goers.  

The unseen world is on the march.  The New Testament calls this a "war" in the heavenly realms--not a one-off,  an occasional horror or a tragedy.  War is merciless and this one we are undergoing is no different.  

We can vote people in and out of the White House; we can protest; we can make our disgust known and we can be adamant that what we are seeing is wrong.  So be it. 

But it is bigger than that.  Jesus, who was in a world filled with violence, abuse, war and depravity (the Roman world was not a nice place to be) said to His followers, who would all face persecution and violent death in the future because of that Roman government: “I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world.” (John 16:33)

Peace. Hope. Purpose.  That is what He offered them.  This is what He offers us.  

Stronghold Starter #3: Not Forgiving: Show Mercy? I Don't Get Any.

Wow.  This is a tough one.  We have all suffered at the hands of someone else.  Someone who knew better.  Someone who violated our trust.  Someone who could have stopped, but didn't.  Someone who wore the Christian label, but acted in ways that were anything but.  Someone that when we sought reconciliation, rebuffed us.  Someone who rebuffed us many times.   

Maybe we sought to take on some of the blame, be humble and offer to make amends, only to be looked at with disdain and contempt for appearing to be so weak.

Yuck.  Forgiveness is a touchy thing; I don't think Jesus would have taught on it as much as He did if it were easy-breezy to do.  Think quickly, and multiple verses pop up:

"Forgive us our debts as we forgive our debtors" (Matt. 6:12) Yeah.

"Bear with each other and forgive one another if any of you has a grievance against someone. Forgive as the Lord forgave you." (Col. 3:13) Ouch.

"For if you forgive other people when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive others their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins." (Matt. 6:14-15) Whoa.

"So watch yourselves. “If your brother or sister sins against you, rebuke them; and if they repent, forgive them. Even if they sin against you seven times in a day and seven times come back to you saying ‘I repent,’ you must forgive them.” (Luke 17:3-4) Yikes.

"Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice.
Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you." (Eph. 4:31-32) Alright already...I get it. 

Inescapable, right?  Yes.  Hard to do?   Yes.  Why?  Because at the core of unforgiveness is pride.  Pride provides the perfect starting point for Satan to come in and start building a stronghold.  

Wait a minute!  I was hurt by that person!  Shattered!  Abandoned!  I am the victim here!

True.  Satan loves it when our hurt is real.  He exploits it to get us focused on ourselves.  We pull in, nursing the hurt, and all the while Satan is fanning the flames of our wounded pride.  

Notice the above verses:  They redirect our focus back to the outside, away from ourselves and asking us to reestablish community.  Sometimes it is dangerous to reestablish community with our violators; but Jesus wants us in His community, with His people, seeking fellowship, prayer and healing.  

The last thing Satan wants is our healing.  Healing does not happen in isolation; it happens in community with loving, compassionate people who come alongside us, pray for us and then walk with us towards wellness.  

But pride says, Hey, I received no mercy when I was being hurt/abused/wronged/shattered...so why should I be the one to forgive?  I didn't receive any mercy--quite the opposite--I don't know what mercy looks like anyway.  I am sure not going to learn now.  My life has worked so far (self-protection is my name and unforgiveness is my game) and though deep down I am terribly unhappy, I will not let you see that.  I won't allow that kind of vulnerability to be visible.  I hate weakness.  I will act strong, that I've moved on, but don't cross me.  The unforgiveness is right below the surface.  I do life by myself, thank you very much.

I know of someone who is like this.  He is a pastor.  He knows the Word like no other.  He has benefited from excellent training in the ministry.  But he doesn't want anyone to hold him accountable.  To see his hurt.  To see his pride that has roared up, leaving a debris trail of broken relationships behind him.  Being in community with other believers who are his equals threatens him.  He is only comfortable when he is around those people whom he sees as spiritually inferior.  

I learned a lot from listening to his teachings.  He got me into the Word and excited about it.  My trust in him, however, eroded as I watched his pride take over.  He did not show compassion.  He scorned those who he saw as weak, especially as they battled an illness.  He sees weakness as being caused from a lack of faith.  He has told people, "I never get sick," which implies his faith outshines everyone else's.  

He was terribly abused as a child; his hurt and his wounds are real.  Despite his contention that God has "taken everything away," his wounds still influence his life on a daily basis.  

He didn't receive mercy as a child.  He did not receive compassion as a child.  It was not modeled and although he may intellectually know what mercy is, his hurt drives him.  This has lead to bitterness and a contempt for others.  

I have seen a lovely part of him break through--the Jesus part.  His smile is a joy.  His enthusiasm is contagious.  He loves the Word.  

But unforgiveness is a toxin to the soul, slowly but surely paralyzing it until a person feels dark inside and then acts dark.    

My heart longs for reconciliation.  I tried early on to repair a breach in our relationship, but I was met with accusations (that were proven false, but to no avail), anger (how dare I question him), followed by silence (my name is only mentioned to others with contemptuous tones).    

But, and this is HUGE:  I have to be equally as forgiving as I expect him to be.  Equally compassionate as I wish him to be.  Equally laying pride aside and not nursing the wounds, as I would like him to do.  

In other words, we both need to lean on Jesus. 

Satan would like to sabotage this.

Jesus would like to heal this.

It is his choice.

It is my choice. 

That is forgiveness and that starts to dismantle the stronghold. 

Stronghold Starter #2: Knowledge: I am Smartest/Most Spiritual Person in This Place

We are exploring how Satan starts to build a stronghold in our lives.  How do we open our hearts to such an incursion?  Pride is at the core of all Satan's forays into our lives.  Pride manifests itself in a lot of different ways; some of these ways are seemingly innocent or seem spiritual enough.  But at the core is the stench of pride.

Jesus used a lovely metaphor when describing this seemingly spiritual exterior:

“Woe to you, teachers of the law and Pharisees, you hypocrites! You are like whitewashed tombs, which look beautiful on the outside but on the inside are full of the bones of the dead and everything unclean. In the same way, on the outside you appear to people as righteous but on the inside you are full of hypocrisy and wickedness." (Matt. 23:27-28) 

Jesus is detailing a long list of violations of God's call to His servants; the Pharisees wanted all the accolades and respect they could secure by appearing to be spiritual, yet Jesus could see the emptiness inside and how it was filled with pride.  

Jesus uses another way to describe this condition:

“When an impure spirit comes out of a person, it goes through arid places seeking rest and does not find it. Then it says, ‘I will return to the house I left.’ When it arrives, it finds the house unoccupied, swept clean and put in order. Then it goes and takes with it seven other spirits more wicked than itself, and they go in and live there. And the final condition of that person is worse than the first. That is how it will be with this wicked generation.” (Matt.12: 43-45)

Again, emptiness.  The person looks fine on the outside, but the heart is empty.  As in nature, the spiritual realm hates a vacuum.  To quote a Bob Dylan song, "You gotta serve somebody/It may be the devil, or it may be the Lord/But you're gonna have to serve somebody."   Interesting, one of the lines in the song includes, "You may be a preacher with your spiritual pride..."

A person may appear humble, but it is pride really drives this person.  

We talk about a someone who has to be the smartest person in a room; center of attention; life of the party.  Everyone knows who that person is--we can't help it, because that person is determined to take over the room.  We expect this of people who have not experienced the transformative touch of Jesus.  But when a Christian acts this way, it is injurious to the Body of Christ, for it makes Christ's Body mimic the world.  

Inside of serving from an overflowing cup, people serve from a deep insecurity that supports itself with "I have struggles, but I am not as bad as that person.  I am more spiritual than others at least."  People cling to the one thing that makes them distinctive--their supposed depth of knowledge and belief--and yet fail to see how that allows Satan to make his entrance into their lives.  

Satan then fans the flames of insecurity and also pride of spiritual superiority--a fire that sears all who come near this person.  

Paul called on his leaders in the early church to be teachable.  If I am teachable, I acknowledge several things about myself:

1.  I have not arrived spiritually; I will always have something to learn from Jesus and His Word and
from my brothers and sisters in Christ.  

2.  I may have misunderstood something and need to reexamine it by returning to the Word.

3.  This life in Christ is a process after I initially receive Him into my heart.  I am born again, but
I have to grow and develop in Him just as a baby grows and develops.

4.  I will have setbacks; either I feel sorry for myself or see them as opportunities for growth.

Finally, let's look at Paul.  If anyone could be the most spiritual/smartest guy in the room, it was him by far.  He was the architect of the early church under the work of the Holy Spirit.  

Notice something here with these verses.  Look at the dates when the letters were written, and how he chronologically sees himself:

"For I am the least of the apostles and do not even deserve to be called an apostle, because I persecuted the church of God. But by the grace of God I am what I am, and his grace to me was not without effect. No, I worked harder than all of them—yet not I, but the grace of God that was with me." (1 Cor. 15:9-10; written in AD 53-57)

"Although I am less than the least of all the Lord’s people, this grace was given me: to preach to the Gentiles the boundless riches of Christ..."  (Eph. 3:8; written in AD 62)

"Here is a trustworthy saying that deserves full acceptance: Christ Jesus came into the world to save sinners—of whom I am the worst.  But for that very reason I was shown mercy so that in me, the worst of sinners, Christ Jesus might display his immense patience as an example for those who would believe in him and receive eternal life."  (1 Tim. 1:15-16; written in either AD 64-65 or AD 58-59)

Do you see pride in any of these verses?  Do you see an insecurity that needs to be nursed by being the center of attention?  Do you Satan having moved into an empty heart?  

No.  Paul learned, as he walked in Christ, a fundamental truth:  He had nothing to bring to Jesus and everything to gain by being in Christ.  Any insecurity or shame he felt had come under the healing hand of Christ.  Any arrogance of his greatness had been burned away by Christ's loving and purifying fire.    

He served Christ in Christ and by Christ.  

When your city gates flies open because you feel insecure or arrogant, bring it to the Lord and slam the gate shut in His strength and power.  Stand in Him alone.