Sunday, April 10, 2022

Where's the Other Brother? (Part III)

Where's the older/other brother?   

He's working.  Doing the right thing, yes, but...when his brother returns, as one from the dead (according to Dad) he is conspicuously absent.  

As the father speaks a blessing over the son, the servants array the young man in the garments of acceptance, and the feast preparations are in full swing, the older brother is conspicuously absent.  

He comes up from the field and hears the music coming from the house. Let's give him the benefit of the doubt.  Perhaps he was way out in the field, and didn't hear nor see what was taking place.  But, as he wipes his brow, and nears the shed to put away his tools, the happy sounds catch his attention.  He asks a servant what is happening, hears of his brother’s celebration and becomes upset and will not go into the house.  

Uh-oh.  He is tired, dirty and now angry that this younger brother, whose hurt permeated the house and clung to his father like runaway smoke, now comes back to not to punishment, but to a party.  The older son stands outside, angrier than a wasp caught under a welcome mat. 

"So his father went out and pleaded with him."  "Plead" is a strong word, and implies that the father's heartfelt request that the older son join them was ignored. 

I see the older son staring at his father in stony silence, so furious that he must measure every word, lest he be disrespectful. 

But then the anger and the hurt, long stored away against the younger brother, comes roaring out:  "But he answered his father, ‘Look! All these years I’ve been slaving for you and never disobeyed your orders. Yet you never gave me even a young goat so I could celebrate with my friends. But when this son of yours who has squandered your property with prostitutes comes home, you kill the fattened calf for him!’"

There it is:  What about ME?  I have worked--more than that, I have slaved in those dusty fields!  I have been obedient and I never have parties and I, I, I...

The older son's focus is on himself and all of his sufferings.  He equally focuses on the father’s shortcomings, especially in dealing with that ne’er’-do-well younger son. 

Then, with the younger son's appearance, the older son starts a Who’s The Better Son  Contest (with the assured winner): 

This son of yours has cavorted with prostitutes!  That’s something I’d never do!

This son of yours has landed this family in financial trouble!  I am slaving away in the fields to help you recover the loss of our money!

This son of yours gets the best this family has—your money and now the fatted calf!  Hasn't that younger son taken ENOUGH?  I didn't even ask for a goat!  You never even offered me a lousy goat!

The older son, while justifiably angry at what the young son did, is really more disgusted at his FATHER, who he perceives as unjust in his treatment of his sons.  The father seemingly rewards the one who is irresponsible and tends to ignore the dutiful one. 

Is that really the case?  

“‘My son,’ the father said..."  Let's stop there.  The father says, "My son," reminding him that his position in the family is no more or no less important to the father's heart. 

Then the father gently reminds him that all the father has is his: "You are always with me, and everything I have is yours."

Why has the older son forgotten this? 

Each day, as he trudged out to the field, did his heart grow more distant, almost imperceptibly at first, from the father?  Was he spending more time out in the fields than with his father?  But there is so much work to do!  And without my stupid brother to help me!  Doesn't Dad see how much I am working?  Does he even CARE? 

Soon, even though the older son's actions were still dutiful, his heart was hardening under the sin of anger and hurt.  Was he then more and more inclined to stay away from his father? 

Did he secretly blame his father?  If you hadn't given in and given him the money in the first place...The older son's relationship with his father was now just hollow obedience.  The older son had, over time, replaced love with duty. 

Love, burdened under a self-imposed list of duties, will become increasingly preoccupied with finishing the duties and now, too tired and resentful, will grow cold.

 The father cuts to the heart of the matter, reminding him that the father is always with him and what the father has is indeed the son's.  The father loves him and this love is not based on the son fulfilling duties.  It is based simply on the bountiful love that the father has for his children.  The father's love simply IS. 

But, love must rejoice! “‘But we had to celebrate and be glad, because this brother of yours was dead and is alive again; he was lost and is found.’” 

The father's love is expressed in two beautiful ways here. 

First, to the oldest:  I am yours, son, and you are mine.  Just ask.  My love will respond.  But, if you don't ask, I will not force myself upon you. I will wait.  But a hardened heart is still sin.  Guard your heart.  But, if you should ever feel your love slowly hardening into duty, come back to love.  I will again forgive you.  My love for you can do no less.

Next, to the youngest:  Your actions speak loudly of your repentance, and I will celebrate the new life welling up in you.  True joy is found in my presence.  But, if you should ever again stray, I will again forgive you.  My love for you can do no less.  

This parable is about two lost sons who have wandered away from the father's loving arms.  Sin is sin:  whether it’s out there for all to see and be disgusted by, or it’s well hidden, buried in a cold heart, unseen and papered over with duty.

Jesus had two “sons” in front of Him that day.

The Pharisees were better at hiding their sin under the mantle of religious duty.  Yet their hearts seethed with resentment that “sinners” should get equal time from God as they do.  They were dutiful, yes, but Jesus identified their lack of love:  their hearts of flesh had turned to hearts of stone.  Only God could see that; Jesus saw it as well.  Their sin was hidden to the unclean masses, but not to Jesus.

The “sinners” couldn’t run and they couldn’t hide.  Everyone knew who they were and what they did.  Some wouldn’t even look at Jesus, their shame bearing down on them with full force.  He saw in them the younger son:  they needed to leave their distant country and return to their Father, with a contrite heart and a willingness to turn from sin. 

He saw the need for reconciliation between His Father and these two “sons.”  He also saw the need for reconciliation between the "older dutiful son" (the Pharisees) and the "younger sinning son" (everyone else).  

His Father’s house was big enough for both kinds of sons.   

Why?  God's love is perfect.  He will wait for however long it takes and will forgive us when we seek Him.  Our Heavenly Father and precious Son embody 1 Corinthians 13's definition of love: 

Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.

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